Be a cop (minus the dog factor)

Personally I don't drive, but here are a few pointers on how to improve the way our traffic works and to reduce migraine symptoms so common with our drivers.

This is something that I have always wanted to do: Equip yourselves with 30"x30" corrugated boads (cheap and lighweight) and a permanent marker with at least 3mm diameter tip. Bring at least 20 boards with you, more if traffic at your place is outrageous. Or if you have unbelievably rude drivers around. Stack neatly on seat. Whenever you see a dumbass stopping inside a yellow box, jumping some very painfuly long queues or whizzing past (anything that is irritating), let the game begin.

Prepare marker pens and start writing. Remarks must be kept simple and straighforward. Not more than 8 words per cardboard if possible. Dumbasses can't read traffic lights, let alone your lengthy messages. So, for the benefit of all, keep them short and sweet. And don't forget to write in small letters, as capital letters need more effort and eye-strain to read. Font size? 40-50mm in height would be sufficient.

What's next? Flash them with your message. It's legal.

Don't forget to add a splash of sarcasm too! Dont go overboard though, you DON'T want to get into trouble. You will never know when you will bump into a psychotic jailbird on parole.

Whenever someone stops inside a yelow box blocking your way, give him/her a nice "Wow! It's a yellow box" or "Thanks for blocking me". When someone whizzes past you (with deafening modified-exhaust turbo sound pollution), give him a "Was that a cop?" or "where's your bumper?".

That would make my day.

As I write this, I think a getting a whiteboard and non-permanent markers are more economical in the long run and hassle-free.

Remember, don't die laughing in the car.

In another sense, blowing kisses to the neighbouring car during a traffic jam works well too to repel annoying dumbasses. This is strictly for the guys.

Girls, this is a great tool for harmless flirting! Write away and flash the cute guy on the bike.

Traffic jams can be more bearable if you have something to eat to while away the time.. so why not come out from your car and have a little picnic? I bet someone will make it big in the news the very next day!

Relax, people!!! Life is meant to be enjoyed.